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29 April 2007 @ 01:18 pm
Bathrooms Gone Bad (30 Hugs: Heiji/Kazuha)  
Title: Bathrooms Gone Bad
Fandom: Detective Conan
Theme: #17—orange; color
Pairing: Hattori Heiji/Toyama Kazuha
Rating: PG
Disclaimer: I do not own Detective Conan or any related characters. They belong to Gosho Aoyama. I simply throw fruit at them, take pictures, and call it modern art. Critics love me.
Summary: When bathrooms attack, things get ugly. And wet.

When Kazuha answered the door, Heiji immediately knew that she was in a bad mood. And something instantly told him that it had nothing to do with the early hour.

Now, he wasn’t always the most observant when it came to his best friend, but he was a detective, and he quickly figured that her sour mood might have had something to do with the fact that her jeans were soaked halfway up to the knees.

Taking a risk, he dared to ask, “What happened?”

She scowled. “Follow me. I’ll show you.”

He obediently trailed up the stairs after her to the bathroom. She opened the door, and Heiji found himself standing in the middle of the mighty Nile River. The extremely cold Nile River…streaming from the Toyama bathroom. Now his jeans were soaked to match Kazuha’s.

He looked down at the water, then at his best friend. “I repeat. What happened?”

“I have no idea. I got up this morning and got dressed and went in there to brush my teeth and I’m knee-deep in cold water,” she huffed, crossing her arms in a full-blown pout. “And Dad’s not home, so it looks like I’m on my own to get it cleaned up.” She paused, and shot him a hopeful look. “…unless you maybe want to help, pretty please?”

Heiji momentarily thought about turning and walking out—just to spite her—but she did look awfully pitiful, and there was a lot of water…and the level of it seemed to be rising steadily, he noticed as the numbness (that water was hella cold!) was creeping closer to his knees. He sighed at how easy he was, and nodded. “Yeah, that’s way too much for one person to do.”

Her smile was enough to brighten up the room…and Heiji felt his face turning bright red in response. He cleared his throat quickly and turned his attention back to the matter at hand. “S-so, what do we think the problem is exactly?”

Kazuha took it upon herself to wade into the bathroom itself in search of the cause of the Great Flood. It didn’t take her long to pinpoint the bathtub as the most likely culprit, as it was filled to the brim and overflowing down the sides. Frowning, she leaned in for a closer examination; she could hear water sloshing as Heiji moved in a little closer behind her.

She reached down into the tub and pulled out the shower head. It was one of those ones on a hose, and not only had it apparently fallen into the bathtub, but it seemed to be broken, as it was released a steady, decent-sized trickle of cold water. That explained where the deluge had come from. And whoever had been in there last had forgotten to unblock the drain in the tub.

She made an angry mental note to scold her father as soon as he got home from running his errands. And maybe make him eat his own cooking to ensure that this never happened again. But first things first—stopping the water.

She reached over and started fiddling with the knobs in an attempt to find the correct combination that would shut it off. “What in the world is wrong with this thi—ACK!” Apparently, she had done something wrong, as a sizable spray of ice-water hit her squarely in the face, drenching her pretty well.

Kazuha let out a shriek and several colorful, creative curses as she fumbled with the shower nozzle to try and end the geyser of frigid water. By some miracle, she managed to turn it the right way, and the water dribbled down to mere bubbles. She coughed and sputtered and shoved wet bangs out of her face before turning back to Heiji. “Could you hand me a towel?”

Heiji didn’t respond. In fact, he seemed to be rather fixated on something.

It took Kazuha far longer than it should have to figure out what he was looking at. In the end, she simply followed his eyes down, down, down…oh CRAP! With a little shriek, she wrapped her arms around her upper torso and took an instinctive step backwards…

…causing her knees to bump into the bathtub’s edge, just enough to push her off-balance and send her flying backwards into the overflowing tub. By some miracle, she managed to avoid hitting her head on the tub, but she still resurfaced with flailing arms and lots of spluttering.

Hands caught her waving ones and pulled, dragging her upwards out of the water. She was now soaked from head to toe; her hair was plastered to her face and neck, the orange ribbon in her hair was hanging lifelessly against her head, her light blue jeans were now a dark cerulean color and sticking uncomfortably to her, and Heiji was again staring at her shirt…which had once been white, but was now colorless and relatively transparent. And very, very clingy.

Kazuha again wrapped her arms around her chest to protect certain areas from his enraptured gaze. “Stop looking, dammit!” Truth be told, his scrutiny wasn’t quite as embarrassing as she thought it maybe should have been, but she vowed to put up a good fight nonetheless.

To his credit, Heiji was blatantly honest. “I can’t help it! It’s there!”

She moved past him, sloshing through the knee-deep water back out into the hallway; the carpet out there was soaked, but at least she wasn’t standing directly in the numbing water anymore. “Heiji, it’s just a bra. Nothing major!”

“If it’s nothing major, then why are you freaking out that I’m seeing it?” he asked, following her out of the bathroom.

Kazuha opened her mouth…and closed it. He had a point, but she wasn’t going to admit that. Instead she just turned on her heel with the intent of hightailing it to her room and changing into something that was neither white nor soaked…and slipped on the wet floor, going backwards. She crashed into Heiji, whose arms instinctively wrapped around her to catch her.

Unfortunately, the force of impact was hard enough that he wasn’t totally prepared for it, couldn’t quite brace himself for it, and as a result, they tumbled together backwards through the open door into the water, Heiji landing flat on his back and Kazuha landing on her back on top of him.

Heiji instantly sat up, his arms still around her waist; she found herself being forced to sit up with him. They sat there together, his chest against her back, coughing and sputtering and trying to wipe the water out of their eyes. And now they were both drenched from head to toe.

Kazuha stood up first and lurched out of the bathroom and away from the flood. But she did have the grace to at least turn and offer Heiji a hand up…also allowing him a perfectly unhindered view of her soaked shirt and the white undergarment beneath it. Still, he accepted the hand without a word about it.

When he was on his feet as well, she smirked. “Turnabout is fair play.” It was then that Heiji realized that his own white shirt was now colorless and see-through, and blushed appropriately.

Footsteps on the stairs made them both turn, and a moment later, Kazuha’s father appeared at the top of the stairs. He took in the scene quickly—flooded bathroom, soaked teenagers, and everything else—and replied in the true parental fashion. “What the hell is going on here?”

Kazuha wrapped her arms around herself again. “This is your fault.”

Heiji nodded, and both glared at the bewildered father, who had no idea what was going on. But fortunately, his beloved daughter was more than willing to let him know exactly what was happening, and what he could do to remedy it.


PS. Fyliwion. Jeva. I BLAME YOU FOR THIS! It’s all your fault, you hear me? BOTH OF YOU!

I did use a similar premise for a Hayate/Himeno Kisses fic and forgot about it. But then I went back to NIACC, and the toilet EFFIN’ SPIT ON ME AGAIN! I’ve also seen bathroom flooding in the dorms when some residents decided they needed an indoor Slip-n-Slide. And then someone suggested a wet T-shirt fic (coughJEVAFYLIWIONcough) and it had to be done. Poor Kazuha.

Anyway, thanks for reading, all. Much love!