Fandom: Detective Conan/Magic Kaitou
Theme: #32—I hate to love, but for you I’m willing to…
Pairing: Kuroba Kaito/Nakamori Aoko
Disclaimer: All characters are the property of Gosho Aoyama. I do not own them. I merely borrow them, drop them in a blender, hit puree, and watch them dance. Yes, dance, my pretties…ahem.
Summary: The sign said “No shirt, no shoes, no service.”
It was Aoko’s idea that they go down to the river and go for a swim in the shallow water near the shore. It was still plenty nice enough for it, after all. Kaito seemed to think it a good plan, so off they went.
But it was Kaito who found a slightly more secluded spot a little further down, hidden from the view of the general public by a conveniently placed rock formation. And it was Kaito’s idea to make the swim a little more…ah, adventurous. And for a while, all was well with the world.
Before they knew it, though, it was getting late, and they decided it was time to leave. Still standing chest-deep in the chilly water, Kaito shivered and looked up at his wife, who was standing on the shore and giving him one of those Looks. “Where are my clothes?”
“Your stuff’s still down…there…” Aoko trailed off as they both realized what was going on.
It almost happened in slow-motion: his clothes slid slooooowly off the edge of the rocks…and right into the water, where they landed with a nice splash before they floated away, carried down on the current towards parts unknown.
Kaito and Aoko stood on the bank and watched it happen. Neither moved for a moment before they slowly turned to look at each other with identical glances, as if to silently say, “Now what?”
In short order, Kaito had clothed himself by hiding behind Aoko; thus “attired,” they made their way back to the car. Fortune smiled this time, however, and no one saw them. Aoko couldn’t quite keep herself from scolding him—it he’d just kept his damn pants on, this wouldn’t have happened—but by the time they got to the vehicle, she was more chuckling at his misfortune than anything else.
Luck had smiled upon them enough that he had a spare T-shirt in the car, and had left his sandals, wallet, and keys there. So at least he was dressed from about mid-thighs up and the ankles down. And Aoko was still giggling as they climbed into the car and headed towards home. She wasn’t taking great pains to avert her eyes or anything; she’d married him, after all. It wasn’t like it was anything new.
It was getting dark by the time they pulled back into town. All seemed to be going relatively well, save for the fact that the driver was still rather pantsless. But the car hid that pretty well, so they were safe on that front, and they were almost home.
Aoko was trying to figure out the best way to get him back into the house without giving any of the neighbors a reason to call the police when Kaito made a sudden turn…and pulled into a convenience store’s well-lit parking lot, stopping in the parking spot right by the store’s front door. “Kaito, what are you doing!” she asked, her voice rising in pitch.
“I’m thirsty, and I want something to drink,” Kaito said cheerily, killing the engine. “Do you want anything?” She stared at him, which he took for a ‘no.’ “All right, suit yourself.” Seemingly without a second thought or any care as to his attire (or lack thereof), he climbed out of the car and headed towards the front door the convenience store, wallet in hand.
He did chuckle to himself as he closed the car door, as he heard Aoko sighing and muttering to herself, “Sometimes I really hate the fact that I love you…” He ignored her, though, and breezed inside—right past the sign that read No shirt, no shoes, no service—and headed straight for the beverage aisle.
It didn’t take him long to make his selection, and he headed for the counter. In the true Kaito fashion, he skillfully ignored the fact that people (one older lady in particular) were staring at him. When he stepped up to the register, however, the cashier looked ready to give him an earful.
Kaito silenced him by speaking first. “The sign said no shirt, no shoes, no service. It said nothing about pants.” He was grinning from ear to ear, and that smile only grew when the harried-looking man behind the register had to agree that he had a point. He was, indeed, following the letter of the law, though not necessarily the spirit. A moment later, he had his change; he thanked the clerk, and headed back out the door towards the car, where his mortified wife was waiting.
Through the windshield, he could see that Aoko was sitting there with her face in her hands. Thanks to the lights in the parking lot, he could also see that her ears were bright red with a blush that was undoubtedly devouring the rest of her face. Poor thing was so embarrassed…one would think she’d be used to this kind of thing by now!
But as he climbed into the car to head for home, Kaito heard an elderly female voice call out from the vicinity of the store’s door, “Kagura! Come quick and look at this! That guy’s not wearing any pants!”
PS. Do you want to know the worst part? That’s right, this is a BOATS fic: Based On A True Story. Reason number 834 why I love my father! Yes, he actually did this…’cept I think he was buying cigarettes, since it was back when he used to smoke. This is also Part Deux of my birthday gift for jeva_chan. because she is multiple levels of awesome. So here. Take it—go on, take it! It’s for you!
Oh, and remember Aya-chan from a couple chapters back? Well, I had a little tiny idea, which I decided to give y’all as an omake. Hope you all get a Chuckle of Evil out of it—it’s ALSO based on a real life occurrence.
Thanks for reading, all. Much love!
How to Quit Smoking
Sitting in the home owned by his daughter and son-in-law, Nakamori-keibu got a sudden craving for a smoke. He pulled a cigarette from his pocket and raised it to his lips, holding the lighter out to light it with a practiced hand. He paused, however, when he noticed a pair of big blue eyes looking up at him from beneath wisps of brown bangs.
Aya-chan, his beloved granddaughter, was peering over the edge of the couch at him. She shook her head slowly and, in the saddest voice he’d ever heard from her, said, “Oh, grandpa…” Then she turned and toddled away, looking forlorn and disappointed.
He sat there for a long moment, cigarette still poised a centimeter from his lips. Across the room, Kaito and Aoko watched with raised eyebrows and restrained smiles of laughter as they waited for the reaction that they knew would eventually come.
And it did.
The gruff Inspector lowered the cigarette and returned it and the lighter to his pocket with a wry shake of his head. He actually looked slightly ashamed. “I think I just quit smoking.”
Yes, my little sister shamed my father into quitting smoking. Just like that, too. Couldn’t help myself :)