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11 November 2007 @ 08:28 pm
Hypothetical (30 Friends: Shinichi-Heiji)  
Title: Hypothetical
Author: Candyland
Fandom: Detective Conan
Friends: Kudo Shinichi/Edogawa Conan and Hattori Heiji
Theme: #13—long distance
Rating: PG
Disclaimer: I do not own Detective Conan—all the characters belong to Gosho Aoyama. I just kidnapped them and hid them in my closet to keep them safe from…I dunno, something awful, I’m sure. Don’t worry, I feed them. Sometimes.
Summary: Heiji has a question. Completely hypothetical, of course.

“Kudo…I have a hypothetical question.”

That was an ominous start to this phone conversation, but Shinichi steeled himself for whatever was going to come next and said, “What’s up?” Somehow, he doubted he was going to like this.

“You know how Kazuha went to America for a while, right?”


“Well…” Hattori said slowly; even though he was all the way in Osaka, Shinichi could almost see him fidgeting as he tried to phrase this the right way. “Let’s say that hypothetically she dated someone while she was there.”


“And that someone broke her heart and hurt her really, really badly.”

“…yes…” Now Shinichi was more concerned than anything else. He liked Toyama-san; he had always thought her to be a strong, intelligent young woman. If something had happened to her…that did not make him a happy guy.

“And let’s call that the reason that she came back to Japan,” Hattori went on. “And that’s how we wound up together and rooming together and all that. You know most of that, right?”

“Hattori, what happened?” Shinichi said shortly; he was worried.

“…what would you do if that guy showed up on your doorstep while you weren’t home and when you came home, you walked in on him kissing her? And then she chased him out, but then he came back and started talking crap about her?” Hattori said in a rush. “Would you kill him? And if so, how would you do it?”

“…Hattori, what the hell?”

“Answer the question.”

Shinichi sighed. “This is hypothetical, right?”


“…if it was me, I probably would deck him. At least once,” Shinichi said honestly, trying to re-imagine the situation with Ran in place of Toyama-san. “I’d make sure he hurt. And then I’d scare him enough that he would never come back. But no, I don’t think I would kill him.”

“Okay, good. Thanks—you’re a real pal!”

“Hattori, wait a—“

Beep beep beep…

Shinichi stared, bewildered, at the receiver in his hand, newly disconnected from its most recent long-distance call from Osaka. “What the hell…?”

PS. I blame this squarely on ytak. Entirely, one hundred percent. This is actually a reference to another fic mini-series I’m doing, simply entitled The Apartment. The first story appeared as the last fic in 30_hugs, and it’s currently being continued in fanfic100. It’s Heiji/Kazuha, and the premise is that Kazuha went to America, had a REALLY bad experience with a guy there, and came back. She and Heiji are now roommates. And also dating. In the most recent installation (fic forty-nine in fanfic100), The Guy popped in for a visit. Which prompted this fic.

Thanks for reading, all! Much love!

(Deleted comment)
Candyland: DC11 [Toichi]candyfics on November 12th, 2007 03:54 am (UTC)
Thank you! *glomps*
girlquinn: Team Avatar heads.girlquinn on November 12th, 2007 02:59 am (UTC)

I think secretly Heiji was hoping Shinichi would tell him that it was okay to kill him.
Candyland: DC02 [Heiji: Girlfriend]candyfics on November 12th, 2007 03:54 am (UTC)
Thank you! *glomp* I think that deep down, that's exactly what Heiji was hoping for ^_~
Katyytak on November 12th, 2007 04:37 am (UTC)
*clasps hands together above head in triumph* Go me! I rock. Now the universes have officially been tied together. ^_^
Candyland: DC03 [Ran: How do I...]candyfics on November 12th, 2007 05:29 pm (UTC)
LOATHE YOU. Except I don't ^_~ *glomps*
Katy: Jazz hugytak on November 12th, 2007 05:59 pm (UTC)
Glad to be of service. *hugs*

So... how many more do you need for 30 friends?
Candyland: DC10 [Kazuha]candyfics on November 12th, 2007 06:08 pm (UTC)
*hugs back*

This was #21, so there are nine more fics. But I have plunnies for the next four, tentatively six. The themes I lack ideas for are "forgiveness," "passing notes," and "friends forever" (which will be the last one). The ones I'm only tentative on are "jealousy" and "making mischief."

I will take suggestions on any of the above! *\o/*
Katyytak on November 12th, 2007 06:38 pm (UTC)
"Passing notes": Shinichi and Heiji are attending a police sponsered lecture for private detectives because the gov't (in the story) now requires them to be licensed and attending the lecture is mandatory. (a quick check told me that Japan does not require PIs to be licensed and, so, a number are fronts for crime org. (http://www.i2brain.org/en/htm/about.html)) How's that for an idea?
"Forgiveness": I see Heiji spoiling a surprise of Shinici's.
No ideas for the rest.
Candyland: DC05 [Aoko]candyfics on November 12th, 2007 06:46 pm (UTC)
...I love you so hard right now *squeezes you to pieces*

If I go with my tentative ideas for the other themes...that will leave me with only "Friends forever," the very last one in the challenge!! \o/ So there's some time to think of a good strong idea for that.

Katy: Jazz hugytak on November 12th, 2007 07:03 pm (UTC)
Ah! There went an arm! XDDD

"Friend forever" brings to mind the old adage of "You can't choose your family but you can choose your friends." Also, quality over quantity.

You're welcome.
Icka! M. Chif: kidimpficsimpfics on November 12th, 2007 07:41 am (UTC)

think Kudo needs to call back soon. XD
Candyland: DC02 [Heiji: Girlfriend]candyfics on November 12th, 2007 05:30 pm (UTC)
*snicker* Cue evasive strategies! And Heiji's inability to lie effectively... xD
shubbimama: HITCHHIKER Giggle giggleshubbimama on November 12th, 2007 06:29 pm (UTC)

(can't say anything, but)

Candyland: DBZ1 [BFF]candyfics on November 12th, 2007 06:43 pm (UTC)
Hee~!! Thank you!! :D
Cherelle_Holmes: Heiji 100% Innocent!cherelle_holmes on December 26th, 2007 06:18 pm (UTC)
The Apartment-fics spread! YEAH!!! >D they slowly take over your other challanges and then he world!!! XD YAYNESS!!!!
Candyland: DC: Heiji/Kazuhacandyfics on January 4th, 2008 05:51 pm (UTC)
IT HAS TAKEN OVER!! *sobs* ^_~