Fandom: Detective Conan
Friends: Kudo Shinichi/Edogawa Conan and Hattori Heiji
Theme: #26—passing notes
Disclaimer: I do not own Detective Conan—all the characters belong to Gosho Aoyama. I just kidnapped them and hid them in my closet to keep them safe from…I dunno, something awful, I’m sure. Don’t worry, I feed them. Sometimes.
Summary: They had to attend this lecture. Nobody said they had to pay attention.
“Fancy seeing you here.”
Heiji looked up at the sound of the familiar voice. “Was wondering if you’d show up.”
“Didn’t really have a choice,” Shinichi replied, dropping into the empty chair next to him; they were thankfully near the back of the lecture hall. “But hey, maybe it won’t be too bad. And if it is…well, you’ll just have to amuse you.” He grinned when Heiji snorted at the idea.
A new law had gone out, decreeing that all private detectives had to register. There were various reasons for this, of course. One of the primary ones was that while a good many of them were good and professional (like Shinichi and Heiji), there were a fair number who operated on some less-than-scrupulous principles or without proper knowledge of various procedures. Some were even fronts for criminal operations.
To combat this, law now required licensure and attendance at certain seminars to make certain that Japan’s private detectives were up to speed on procedure and protocol and knew how to work with police, as well as weeding out the ones who weren’t in the professional to help people.
Both Kudo Shinichi and Hattori Heiji were household names as detectives, and had been since their late teens. They knew all of the material listed on the seminar outline as well as they knew their own names. This was old hat to them. But the law was the law, and if they wanted to continue with their successful livelihoods, they were going to have to play along and suffer through this.
They sat and just talked while they waited for this show to get on the road. Various others stopped to greet them upon entering; given their reputations, this was not entirely unfounded. They saw plenty of people they recognized from past cases or meetings, and many others that they didn’t. When Mouri Kogoro entered, he waved to them but did not come over; granted, he probably saw a fair amount of his son-in-law as it was. But there was one young man who stopped over to shake their hands with no small amount of hero-worship in his eyes.
As the young man moved away in search of a seat, Heiji turned to his friend with a smile that was only mildly amused. “Do you think we’re the reason he went into this field?”
“Could be,” Shinichi replied. “But that doesn’t mean he won’t do well.” The Detective of the East sat back in his chair. “So how is Kazuha-san doing? And how are you doing? Wedding plans coming along?”
Heiji turned faintly pink. “She’s freaking out. I think she would have gone completely crazy if my mother wasn’t there to make sure everything went along smoothly. I’m perfectly happy to leave all the planning in their hands, though. I only venture an opinion if I’m directly asked. That way if something gets messed up, Kazuha can’t blame me for it. I had nothing to do with it.”
At that, Shinichi laughed. “I will admit that Ran and I did leave a lot of the plans for our wedding in her mother’s hands. Eri-san is a very efficient, very organized woman…and both Ran and I were too love-struck to really be useful. So she charged ahead. If she hadn’t, we probably wouldn’t have had much of a reception.”
“How is Neechan?” Heiji asked; they were adults now, but he still called Ran by the affectionate nickname he had adopted for her when they’d first met as teenagers. “She’s hanging in there?”
“The doctor said she has to hang on for another two weeks. After that, the baby can come anytime it wants.”
“Scared to death.”
The conversation was cut short when the lights dimmed and a thin man with a moustache stepped up to the podium at the front of the room. “May I have your attention please? Find your seats.” There was a rustle as the few people still standing in the aisles scattered in search of vacant chairs.
When the noise died down, the lecture began. The first speaker was discussing proper crime scene procedure: wearing gloves, preserving evidence, questioning witnesses, and the like. In other words, they were explaining things that Shinichi and Heiji had been aware of since childhood and actively doing since their late teens.
Needless to say, neither was really paying attention. This was a formality. All they really wanted to do was fill out the paperwork to get their licenses and get out of there. Unfortunately, that was the last thing on the itinerary for the day, so they were just going to have to wait.
As the speaker flipped yet another slide with yet another bulleted list and explained the proper means of collecting physical evidence, Shinichi felt something touch his hand on the table. He looked down to see that Hattori had pushed a notebook towards him, bumping it into his fingers to get his attention. Heiji’s eyes, however, seemed to be totally focused at the front of the room.
Shinichi pulled the notebook over and looked down at it. At the top of the page, in Heiji’s semi-literate scrawl, was written So bored! It was accompanied by a crudely-drawn picture of a sleeping face, complete with a sound balloon constituting a snore.
He bit back a chuckle and picked up his own pen. He wrote Necessary evil? Or is this legalized torture? And he drew an equally-crude sketch of a stick figure cracking a whip before sliding it back across the table.
Heiji laughed quietly and scribbled, Maybe they think there are too many detectives and this will cut down on the surplus? There’s gotta be some kind of conspiracy here.
Shinichi grinned. Still don’t understand why we couldn’t get a free pass on this. We busted the Black Organization. What else do they want from us?
Heiji wrote back, To test their new insomnia cure?
Kudo and Hattori use it! You should too! Shinichi scribbled, now fighting to keep from laughing out loud. Really, this was incredible juvenile, and far more suited to a high school classroom than two experienced professional detectives at this kind of a lecture. But really…it was sort of fun.
This time Heiji’s reply consisted of a large drawing of several snoring stick figures and a person with devil horns cackling next to them. The speech balloon read something about world domination.
For some reason, that did it. Shinichi bust out laughing, and when the entire lecture hall (including the speaker) fell silent and turned to look at him in surprise, he quickly had to convert the laughter into a massive coughing fit. After all, he was Kudo Shinichi. He was a well-known, well-respected professional. He did NOT start laughing uproariously in a setting like this.
Thinking quickly, Heiji stood up and waved a hand. “Sorry, I think he choked on something.” He conveniently flipped the notebook cover closed as he grabbed Shinichi’s arm and pulled him from the hall and out into the lobby, where they could both safely get their amusement out before going back in.
Maybe this wasn’t going to be as bad of a day as they thought. At least they could keep each other amused.
PS. I send this out to ytak, who inspired it. Thank you! And this makes twenty-five. Five more fics until this challenge is done, yay! Hope you enjoyed the story. Thanks for reading, all! Much love!