Author: Candyland (candy__chan)
Fandom: Mythbusters: Two guys tackle some crazy urban myths, trying to prove or disprove them. Things tend to be destroyed. Or blow up. EXPLOSIONS ABOUND!
Taunt: My fandom has secrets on fandomsecrets. Therefore, it is a fandom.
Note: No RPS here. I’m still clinging to my last delusion of credibility.
Okay, guys, listen up. We have to talk. Enough is enough, and I am done taking all this abuse quietly. Crash-test dummies have feelings too, ya know. And I feel that this is absolutely ridiculous!
Do you know what you guys put me through? DO YOU? I’ll enlighten you on a few things.
You guys have set me on fire, dropped me from VERY high places, dropped a barrel of bricks on me, knocked me out of a chair, shot me in the leg (although you didn’t use my real leg—I’m not completely ungrateful for small favors), dropped me in a makeshift airplane, tossed me into water from a crane with a freakin’ hammer in front of me, tossed me from a catapult…
Then you rebuilt me, all good as new. I felt pretty good about that. I really did. Was a little more muscular than I was before—which is all right by me. I’m not at all opposed to getting in shape.
And then you christen my awesome new body by putting me in a car…raising that car up to the veeeeery top of a crane…and dropping it. Does anyone else see the problem here? And I don’t even know what else. I’ve lost track of everything. Might be the head injuries.
I’ve had broken bones, burned flesh, various mutilations, more injuries than I can even count. My own mother wouldn’t recognize me, my face is such a mess…and now you’re talking about exploding PANTS?
Enough is enough!
Put me down!
No, Tory, no one ordered any exploding pants!
…why does no one listen to me?
PS. *opens mouth* *stares at Buster-centric fic for a moment* *closes mouth and slinks away in shame*